The story ran in the New York Daily News under the headline: “Think You Got it Bad? Meet Luckless Larry.” Larry is a man who has reason to think life is unfair. A news article said, “Jolted, jilted, hammered in a car crash and robbed, Lawrence Hanratty was named the unluckiest man in New York. First, he was nearly electrocuted in a construction site accident in 1984 that put him in a coma for weeks. Then Hanratty lost the lawyers fighting his disability claim – one was disbarred, two died – and his wife ran off with one of the lawyers.”
Hanratty has spent years fighting heart and liver disease. Recently his car was wrecked. When police left the scene of the accident, Larry was held up and robbed. Hanratty asks, “How much more am I going to be tested in life to see how much I can endure?”
As if he hasn’t tolerated enough hardship, an insurance company wants to cut off his benefits and his landlord has threatened to kick him out of his apartment.
Hanratty uses a canister of oxygen and takes 42 pills a day for his heart and liver ailments. But with help from neighbors and a New York state assemblyman, he is not giving up yet. “There’s always hope,” he says.
LUCKLESS LARRY IS NOT ALONE
Life wasn’t fair to students who were killed in the random shooting in a high school. Life isn’t fair when a seven-year-old child is sexually abused. Life isn’t fair when someone spreads untrue accusations about you and you cannot defend yourself.
Have you ever felt that life just isn’t fair? Perhaps some one else received a promotion that you deserved or some one in the office got credit for what was really your idea.
Let’s face it – life isn’t fair. Good things happen to bad people and bad things happen to good people.
It isn’t fair that America, with only a small percentage of the world’s population, has 80% of the world’s wealth.
Life isn’t fair when an athlete, who can’t count his change at a Burger King, gets paid $10 million a year, while his teacher is paid a barely livable wage.
Life isn’t fair when a dangerous crook can buy a presidential pardon, but someone else wallows in jail because he couldn’t afford a decent lawyer.
Is it fair when people who take care of their bodies get cancer, while others who abuse their bodies are never touched by disease?
Chi Chi Rodriguez grew up in poverty in Puerto Rico but escaped poverty by playing golf professionally. When asked about fairness, he replied, “If life were fair, then I would have been born named Rockefeller.”
Bill Gates, of Microsoft wrote, Eleven Rules Young People Should Learn but Don’t. Rule number one is: Life is not fair. Get used to it!
King Solomon wrote much the same thing. I have seen something else (under the sun): The race is not to the swift or the battle to the strong, nor does food come to the wise or wealth to the brilliant or favor to the learned; but time and chance happen to them all. (Ecclesiastes 9:11).
WHAT IS FAIR?
The word, “unfair” describes situations that are not equal or just. When things are fair, everyone is on the same playing field and everyone is treated the same way.
We think it is unfair when someone, less skilled than us, is promoted ahead of us, because of who they know. We believe every person should be treated equally.
Where do we get the idea that life should be fair? We think we should all have the same talents and abilities. We think we should all have the same opportunities. We believe there is some power that is supposed to keep things fair. We inherently believe God exists to keep a balance sheet and mete out fairness.
Most people think that if life is unfair, then God must be to blame. Thinking like this often triggers an outburst of anger towards God. Then, we find it difficult to trust God to work things out.
In the natural, the rule of life seems to be the luck of the draw. Life seems to be the random dealing of a deck of cards. Some start life with wealth and influence; others start the journey with weak bodies, troubled families and economic slavery. Some are blessed with health and happiness in retirement; some age in poverty and pain or die young.
We think life should be fair because of our belief in God. We believe God is just, so we assume that God will use his power and knowledge to make everything turn out fairly. This creates a problem. If we believe life is not fair, it leads us to believe God is not fair. Of course, that’s a dangerous conclusion.
UNFAIRNESS IN THE BIBLE
Jesus told a parable about three men. One was given five talents, one man got two talents and the other man just one. Not every person received the same. Jesus was showing, among other things, that we don’t start out equally talented.
We are not the first generation to question God’s fairness. In the Old Testament, Job struggled with what appeared to be unfair. Job was victimized unfairly even though he was the most righteous man alive. He lost everything.
Isaac had two sons: Esau and Jacob. Esau deserved the inheritance that went to the oldest son but Jacob deceived his father and gained the inheritance. Jacob treated Esau unfairly.
Do you remember Joseph, Jacob’s son? Joseph’s brothers abused him, tried to kill him and sold him as a slave. Joseph did nothing wrong. In fact, he was morally upright. Yet, he was cut off from his family and, at one point, left to rot in prison.
King Saul was unfair to David. Saul tried to kill him, even though David treated Saul with kindness and mercy.
No one was treated more unfairly than Jesus. He lived a perfect life and helped many people but was despised and rejected by the religious leaders. He was arrested, falsely convicted, deserted by his closest friends and died a horrendous death. Was what happened to Jesus fair? Was it fair that Jesus experienced all that pain and suffering? Was it fair that he endured such rejection and persecution? No way! But then life is not always fair as we see fairness.
How do we handle unfairness? What should our response be when unfair situations come our way?
1. TREAT OTHERS FAIRLY
God intended the world to be a much fairer place than it is. God intends his children to demonstrate that fairness.
And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God. (Micah 6:8).
This is what the Lord Almighty says: “Administer true justice; show mercy and compassion to one another.” (Zechariah 7:9).
Don’t let what you think is unfair simmer inside you until you explode. Don’t retaliate. Forgive from your heart. Bless those who curse you. Be generous to those who are unkind to you.
2. TAME YOUR ANGER
When life is unfair, control your anger. Anger won’t help. It will only hurt and prompt you to do something you’ll regret.
Don’t blame. Don’t blame someone else. You may not have all the facts. Don’t criticize anyone until you have walked a mile in his shoes. Then when you criticize him, you’ll be a mile away and you’ll have his shoes! The blame game has no winners. Blaming provides only a temporary solution; it doesn’t solve any problems.
Don’t retaliate. Watch out for the thinking, “Don’t forgive; get even!” Don’t rehearse the things you’d like to do. Don’t make a list and keep a record. Don’t lash out when you are treated unfairly; let God settle the score.
Don’t feel sorry for yourself. Put up a sign, “No pity parties allowed here.” Don’t whine when treated unfairly. Feeling sorry for yourself is a trap. Self-pity won’t help or change the situation.
Don’t stuff your negative feelings inside. Don’t pretend you aren’t upset, when you are. When you deny your feelings and fail to deal with them, they eventually come out in what you say and do.
3. TRUST GOD’S WISDOM AND GRACE
When we experience unfairness, we see only the present. We fail to see beyond the current situation to embrace God’s ultimate purposes and plans.
Joseph saw the big picture. He told his brothers, You meant it for evil but God meant it for good. Joseph understood the big picture and trusted God’s wisdom.
When life is unfair, remember, God is not unfair. He hasn’t changed and he will bring you through. God’s not finished with you yet. God wants you to trust him when you don’t understand. God’s grace is sufficient. God wants to heal your wounds and give you grace for the journey.
Here’s how Paul handled unfairness. I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. (Romans 8:18).
God will watch over you. God can turn your situation around for your benefit and his glory.
4. THANK GOD FOR HIS UNFAIRNESS
If God treated us fairly , as we think of fairness, we’d be punished for our sins and destined to hell. But even though we’ve offended God by our thoughts, motives and behavior, he saves us as an act of grace.
I remember a preacher being interviewed on TV. He had been the chaplain assigned to a man convicted of war crimes. The man had been a leader of the movement against the Jews and the holocaust. This preacher claimed that during the weeks before this prisoner was executed, he came to faith in Jesus. The preacher said that though the crimes against the Jews were terrible, because of God’s grace and this man’s faith, that the moment he was executed, he went to heaven.
I will never forget the disbelief of the reporter doing the interview. He said it’s unfair for a man who has done all that evil, on the basis of faith in Jesus, to escape God’s punishment and go to heaven, while other morally good citizens will go to hell because they do not believe Jesus. He said, ”That’s not fair.” He was right. But it’s true.
Eternal life is not based on fairness; it’s a gift of God’s grace. If eternal life were fair, it would be based on the quantity and quality of our good deeds. If fairness ruled, no one would ever see heaven!
But God demonstrates his love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. (Romans 5:8).
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